26 September 2006

Disappointed Instructor Face (tm) AHOY!

I was mean to the kidlets today.

I put the high, average, and passing score up on the wall-o-whiteboard and was very quiet until they all came in and class started at the designated hour.

I then pointed to the scores and said in my best Disappointed Instructor voice (booming, no less)... "This should never happen again."
...Shocked look on the students' faces
"You have priorities in life. I understand this. This course should be a priority. If you cannot pass my quiz, you will not be able to pass Relatively Easy Certification Exam. So, it's up to you to rethink your priorities... Or explore your options."
...Stunned silence. Kinda like I'd just told them the truth about Santa and what he really does with the reindeer and elves up at the lonely North Pole.

You see, I'm not allowed to encourage any students to withdraw. Or drop the course.

Not even Mumbling Boy, with his IQ of 80. (I'm not saying that to be cruel, my supervisor agrees that he either has a severe LD or an IQ of around 80... I love the people I work with!) Oh, and today in class? Mumbling Boy announced his grade to the class - well below passing - and wandered in and out during lab... Guess who's not getting full points... Three guesses and the first two don't count.


So, if you read the posts from yesterday, you know I had a day. I got home and my brain was broken. Shattered into a million pieces broken. And then a good friend of mine links me something that caused me to give the response of "if my brain wasn't already broken, it would be now."

(Extremely NSFW)

I present to you...
Pterodactyl Porn
Tyrannosaurus Sex

Yes. There are officially fetishists for everything now. Of the two, for sheer humor I would encourage you to watch Pterodactyl Porn. It includes pointless pterodactyl puppetry along with costumes.

...And my mom thought furries were odd when she found out about their existence via CSI. I shared the concept of Dino Porn with her this evening while we were talking about the way the retards1 mentally handicapped (can be trained for repetitive menial jobs, but no substantial life skills) students pair up in the dorms. Yes. Pair up as in hook up. Thankfully, part of the program is enforced birth control.

Back to the teaching thing. I think my students are going to believe I have a mental disorder because I started class with a stern lecture, made them laugh during the informative lecture, and then berated them for their quiz scores at the end of class. Then we had lab. A lab that really should not have taken as long as it did. But they were scared. And way overthinking everything.


Of course, there's talk about canceling my class and refunding my students because the certification exam they have to take is being changed. Now, because it's past the add/drop date, and my class made, I think they'll still have to pay me my contracted amount. Especially because the class would be cancelled for things beyond my control.

1Look, I remember when 'retard' was a proper term for someone with a mental handicap. The mental/emotional growth (and sometimes physical growth) was retarded (retard (v): to slow up especially by preventing or hindering advance or accomplishment) and it was the best descriptor. Now, everyone and their brother has a mental handicap or disability. But you know what? When I say 'retard,' you know exactly what I mean.

To hell with being all politically correct. I fear political correctness and its implications far more than I fear terrorists/the radical right/the radical left/the Shetland Islands.

No comments: